During the past month mid Jan to now I have had much time to reflect on our society; where it is currently, where it is heading and why things are the way they are. It's very heart breaking to see the land of the free in such disarray, emotionless, evil, dark and uncaring about the fellow man.
Why have we allowed it to get this way?
Where did things go wrong?
How do we fix humanity
I believe that due to the moral compass that has been given by politics, religious leaders and business leaders we the people have lost the since to feel. We don't feel because we are afraid that someone is out to get us, take what we have, something is owed to us, offended so easily by hearing the truth so we make excuses for bad behavior. WHY? What happened to being there for one another, opening the door for someone, saying yes ma'am and yes sir, treating others as would like to be treated, exposing those to the world who are corrupt or hurtful, dealing with crime the way it should be (fair and impartial), telling our children no you didn't do good today you failed, and not allowing anyone to go without? I could go on with making a list but I only get more frustrated and emotions come into play when I do. Have we lost ourselves? Have we lost the ability to decipher what should be morals and what is ethical and unethical? I don't think so, I believe we just don't care.
Think about it. What if we stopped allowing the government and we all know social media to be the basis of our decisions. What if we told our children the truth that they failed, you didn't give enough to make the team and allowed the sport to be won and rewarded as it should be instead of everyone gets a trophy. What if stopped being soooooo freaking sensitive and actually reflected upon our decided actions and take responsibility for the wrong we did instead of making excuses to get our way. What if allowed our hearts to become warm and showed love to everyone around us, would it not cause a ripple affect that could possibly change our world back to the way I believe it was designed to be, to be a friend, brother, mother, sister father etc... to everyone around us then would there be any more crime or need for government to dictate our actions and abilities? No. I am a father and a husband and I get extremely frustrated with the way parents cop out on their kids today. They allow them to watch and listen to whatever they want and then are mentally confused as to why we have school shooting, teen pregnancy, drug addictions and why our children don't mind us. Being a parent is hard work. I am in the military plus am currently on drill sergeant duty, however on my ride home from work I literally speak to myself "be kind, be loving, be understanding", so that I can be the best dad as well as husband I can be regardless of work/life stress or how tired I am. I tell myself "dude you have one chance to be a dad today, as tomorrow you can change today". I come home and instead of vegetating in front of the tv I spend at least two hours with my son doing whatever he wants to do, mentoring him, telling him he is wrong if need be or that is a character of a looser don't be like that, loving and hugging him. My son has severe ADHD and he really tries my nerves with his energy and lets be honest his mouth. He gets loose at the lip a lot and I discipline not allow it to grow and become a typical leech on society. NO WAY!!! What my point is here is dad and moms, we have one chance to be a positive influence on our children, then they grow up and there gone then we can either watch them flourish or watch them be a pathetic citizen.
Moving on to being a husband or wife. Many times we can always point the finger at the other and say it’s their fault, I want a divorce or stay in our ways that doesn’t contribute to a conducive relationship. I will share about my marriage on this. I was married at 20yrs old, joined the Army at 21, went to basic, spent five months in job specific schools, my son was born at the end of the school, graduated moved to my first duty assignment and six months later was in Iraq during OIF II. When I returned I was jacked way up from what I say and experienced. Due to me already being a husband and dad, I pushed hard for success in my career, put them on the back burner for several years till I got to a rank where I was the decision maker. After reaching this I realized that I had a broken hurt marriage and it was all my fault. My wife spirit was crushed and I had a six year old child that I barely even knew. I could have said oh well I doing what I know to do to take care of and keep my same speed. However my decisions are based upon what would Christ do and would he love her. I begin to transform mentally in a way that I had to confront some of my darkest demons that lay wait with big swords. It took me about six months to get my rage, anger and selfishness under control. However when I did I became a hero, my wife was in love with me and my son adored me.
What am I saying here? What are we doing in this life with our marriages? We date and it’s pure ecstasy then we marry, find out who they really are begin to become bitter. Why? Because we don’t change for one another. Our thought process is well if you change I will change. NO! Let me tell you something, during my new walk my wife didn’t change one bit. She was angry, rude, abusive in language and my son wanted nothing to do with me. However I stayed the course for me! I wanted to be better husband, father, lover and human. After the six months I would say about nine months after that my wife broke down her heart walls and what a wonderful woman she is. So if you do decide to live for your marriage than yourself know that it’s a marathon not a sprint.
Marriage today is no more than like dating. What I mean by this is we get married, enjoy the honeymoon years, then reality of life sets in and then we divorce. Not only does it effect our hearts but the children we have. What are we saying to them, that it’s ok when things get tough in your relationship to just bail out? Sure is. We really need to think about this as to the main point where is our moral compass. Trust me, there were many times during the past 10yrs when the D talk came up and one time it almost happened. However I looked at what could I do to change this train wreck and so glad I did. I hear many folks say “I’m just set in my ways, either you like me for who I am or go away”. What a copout. We evolve everyday mentally where you want to agree or not, we do! We change our thought process at work to be successful or meet the bosses intent, change our clothes, the cars we buy, what we purchase based upon current need, yet we say we can’t change for our marriage. Sad. I literally when I get off work talk to myself before I get to the house and remind myself to be loving, kind and understanding. When I walk through door I am just me and a dad. I do whatever I can to focus my energy and thoughts on my family. I don’t touch my forums or answer questions until right before bed. This shows my wife and son that they take center place in my life. I will stop the rant here as I am sure your eyes are hurting. Know this we can choose the easy way out in marriage or we can dig in, set up a foundation and build a castle of love that will never fail!
Lastly to be a better friend to the world. I know our society is jacked up and I am not say be super here nice person to try to affect the world. NO!! ! Work on affecting your circle of reach, at work, home, school, gym etc…, your immediate reach. Then by what you do will be contagious, trust me. I use to be a walking demon. After I came back from my deployment I had no feelings, no sense of caring, heartless and mean. When I begin to change my home life I looked at how that work and began to change everything else. I am glad I did. People at work respected me more, did what I said without having to be vicious (mind your there are those that will never get and you have to put your boot down as well that is the way they are and they are never going to change right)? LOL. I begin to see that those who were under me lives changed then those who allowed themselves changed, then those around them changed and it creates a wave affect. You roll in with change go out, they roll in with their change, roll out and so forth. It was amazing to see an evolution if you will of my Soldiers. They loved me yet respected me, and the bad eggs where dealt with accordingly.
When I was out and about with those I could touch I showed love for humanity, showed a kind approach to everything I did and said and over time watched them to soften and began to affect those around them.
To sum it up is we are not to far gone, we just have to be willing to be reached. Allowing our “set ways” to be changed for the better of our world. There will always be evil people because people that have evil intentions always will either be changed or dealt with by the kinder folks and will extradite themselves away from our society. So today think about what you can do to be a difference maker first in your house if you are married or not and have kids. If you are divorced ok, so what, begin to change where you are now and become a more loving person and watch the waves become beautiful.
Dig deep in a mindset that I am going to change society by not allowing others to govern my thoughts but by making a decision to allow yourself to think with a heart. I hope you don’t see this as a rant but more of me reaching out to find another hand I can grab and pull to reality of friendship and with due time in trust family. We can change this world one person at time, one marriage at a time, one work place at a time, one gym at a time then we have made our life worth living and will find that we will never have to worry about anything because those around us are watching our backs to speak to help get us through.
I hope this touches your heart and know that I am here for you all, just had a moment of thought and had to get it out.
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Originally Posted by Ecto
